These parents have learned to recognize and accept their feelings, for example that "it is okay to be sad." They are aware of their children's lower-intensity feelings and view their children's emotional displays as a time for connection and teaching. Early experiences become ingrained in how we feel about feelings, and affect our ability to form healthy relationships.īased on their emotional history, some parents become good at what psychologists call emotion coaching. I lead research projects that investigate the usefulness of programs that teach parents how to understand their "feelings about feelings" and guide their children in healthy emotional regulation and coping strategies.Īll of us have a long emotional history that comes from the emotional climate we grew up with.
When someone becomes a parent, the models they had can become embedded in how they in turn parent.Ī parent's organized set of thoughts and feelings about their own and their child's feelings is what some psychologists call " parental meta-emotion philosophy." Understanding this can make a big difference in parenting and children's development.
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